- Steve spends more time in the make-up chair than anyone else, at least if Mark is to be believed.
- Craig has got a new house in Hampshire.
- Craig wishes we had a points system so that he doesn't have to round down a 3.5 to a 3. Craig is wrong (not least because you round a .5 up, not down).
- Craig doesn't think Scott is putting any effort into the artistry of dahnce.
- Thom’s “nightclub moves” are really not sexy.
- Iveta fell out of the one-armed lift in the salsa because her bracelets were slipping, and it was definitely not Thom’s fault. Apparently.
- The reason Sunetra cried after her cha cha cha was because her dress run had gone really badly and she was surprised that she was actually capable of doing it.
- Sunetra isn’t good at telling her left from her right. She’s not great at getting gloves on the correct hands either.
- Craig thinks the resurrection of fusion is perfectly fine. Craig is, again, wrong.
- Gregg thought he would be better at dancing when he signed up.
- Anton has instructed Judy not to listen to Craig.
- Judy has been teaching Anton some Scottish words. His accent still needs work, though.
- Karen Hardy disagrees with Len about Alison’s strength being in the Latin; she thinks Alison is going to be a ten-dancer.
- Karen Hardy thinks Alison should stay in Aljaž's arms - it's what she would do.
- According to Karen, “legs and bodies always move at separate times to each other. Legs are your wheels, bodies are your change of direction.” It probably made more sense in the original Spanish.
- Caroline really wants to impress Darcey. She doesn’t really know why. Neither do we.
- It is quite sexy when Pasha rolls his Rs.
- Alison thinks her big boobs are going to make it hard for her to make the sort of smooth lines that (for example) Pixie does.
- Aljaž's hands are getting less clammy.
- Alison has been rubbing Aljaž’s apple for him. WAIT NO JANETTE COME BACK IT’S NOT WHAT YOU THINK.
- Ola is great at photobombing (videobombing? tellybombing?) comedy VTs.
- The thing where viewers' children dance in front of the TV has infected this show, too. Although it probably fits better here than on the weekend show.
- Jake has never had a dance lesson before coming on Strictly. Chinny reckon.
- Jake has natural rhythm. Is that the first time this has been said about a white (and ginger!) contestant on this show? (Bear in mind he said it about himself, however)
- Jake used to play the drums.
- Zoe'n'Norm tried and failed to emulate Jake and Janette's moves in their kitchen.
- Zoe claims Norman Cook is 63. His Wikipedia bio says 51. Someone is lying but I'm not sure who.
- The rumba is made up of rumba walks. *The More You Know starwipe*
- Pasha is cramming all the choreography into Caroline, but she can handle it. This show is getting as filthy as Bake Off.
- Scott Mills had to wear a child's swimming cap in the name of comedy props. (I would actually have to wear one if it were me because I have a tiny head - Rad) (I have a comically large head, just in case anyone's interested. - Steve)
- Joanne thinks Scott is “what the competition is about”. So many people are “what the competition is about” at this point that we’re getting very confused.
- Wand Erection are backing Scott. Probably not Resentful, though. I suspect he's an Aliona fan.
- Steve is a Jungle Book fan. Unsurprisingly.
- Simon's mum didn't smile until he finished dancing.
- “The ladies will like it” is all the motivation Simon needs to do a dance move.
- In 1986, Zoe tried to get a Kelly McGillis perm, but it made her look like Margaret Thatcher.
- Simon is worried that if he does a bad rumba, people will think he is rubbish in the sack.
- Caroline loves playing with the idea of a showmance. Watch out Rachel Riley!
- Tim has waltzed with his wife, but not yet attempted a cha cha cha or a charleston with her.
- Sunetra is suited to jewel colours.
- Wardrobe mistress Vicky doesn't seem to think Sunetra will be in the show long, given she talked about dressing her 'while we can'.
- Black is usually avoided by the wardrobe team even though everyone wants it.
- Scott’s national humiliation will continue this weekend as he dresses as a crab in front of approximately nine million viewers.
- Janette says that the waltz is “easy steps, hard technique”.
- Scott's hip action is non-existent.
- Going over the top makes Frankie feel self-conscious. This might not be the show for her in that case.
- Kevin wants to form a boyband with Aljaž, Pasha, Tristan and Trent. They will be called The Wednesdays.
- Kevin invents routines in the evening dancing around his living room with his headphones on.
- Zoe is still a pretty nifty dancer.
- Robin Windsor is still alive and choreographing cute pre-credits ITT routines. His choreography still hasn't improved.
- Zoe dances when she's in the shower, hoovering and in her pants.
- Pixie is having to retrain her brain to cope with the kerrazy positions in Latin and Ballroom.
- Pixie and Trent can't believe they got the same mark as Jake and Janette on Saturday. Neither can we.
- Pixie has never seen a quickstep before. Such a loyal fan of this show.
- Mark hasn't really banned his family and friends from attending the show.
- Mark wanted to be Superman as a kid. His being Superman involved running with one hand in the air and the other pulling his pants up.
- Karen and Mark nicknamed his arm movements in his American smooth “the Darcey arms”. I’m sure Darcey was thrilled.
- Scott is going to be the sexiest crustacean we’ve ever seen. It’s good to have ambition.
- Donny Osmond is celebrating fifty years in showbusiness.
- Sara Cox wants to put Judy through a cartoon mangle to smooth her out.
- Richard Arnold thinks Caroline has sex appeal in spades.
- Donny Osmond thinks the top of the leaderboard is a dangerous place to be. I thought that was the middle. And the bottom. IS NOTHING SAFE?
- Richard Arnold and Sara Cox think Judy might be in the bottom two. (By herself, apparently.) Donny Osmond is not allowed an opinion because he’s a temporary judge.
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